Thank you
for coming to aid us in this life-saving effort, to help Mari walk again, to live again. There are many ways to die and many ways to live, my friend, but to live in pain, with no soon death to look forward to as a welcome relief, is a torturous existence that is no life at all, none that you would want to live. It is a sad irony that many people would jump out, even at their own peril, to save the life of someone in danger of being killed or crippled....yet these same "good" people turn away and think it acceptable that a fellow human being would be forced to suffer interminable daily pain, cripplling, debasement as a human, as a woman, to writhe in agony and pine away for want of being a productive person again, all at the expense of her family who cannot afford the expenses of these arthritic illnesses and damaged spinal nerves, deformed hip sockets that hunted her down over many years, until walking was not possible in any real way just these last few years. Many internal organs are now degrading, somewhat due to lack of normal walking and movement. We do not have the funds for the many surgeries needed to fix the spine and nerves, and replace the hip, possibly the knees, redo a neck surgery, supply the several years of physical therapy treatments at $60-$100 each even at the discount rate, nor get the hospital bed and hydrotherapy pool at home needed and get the medicines and nutriceuticals used for these conditions. The laser spinal surgeries cost $12,000 each, and are not available in NC, and I need probably 4 altogether. The electric cart for outdoor use costs up to $4000 to have the power for the hill our house is on, and no pavement to use it on. I cannot even tell you what a solar-blanket heated little swimming pool above ground would cost because it breaks my heart to even dream that far, for something that so many people set up in their yard for the kids to play in, that would mean the difference for an arthritic body to get the only exercise that it could stand to do.....for me, even my dreams are painful. I have gone over the brink of pain and strain, to where I have no strength to try to find any way out, any way to ignore, and yet I have no way to escape other than to find someway to take my own life.
I do not want to die; I want to live, I want to walk again. Please help me.
I would like someone to donate their services to help me get federal filing needed so that people could donate and get a tax deduction for their blessing to my need. I should have no trouble filing a 501c3 non profit, I am not, or at least I used to not be dumb, or skill-less clerically, yet the diseases have robbed me of my mind, my memory, my tenacity. Many months go by before I can even return a phone call to a friend. I am most ashamed to be unproductive, to have been unable to work since 1995 when the first spinal disc ruptured, even while I was with both hands in wrist splints due to undiagnosed Carpal Tunnel syndrome and limping in both legs from undiagnosed bilateral Hip Dysplasia, birth defects of small hip sockets damaged by arthritis breaking away at the edges of the small sockets, pinching leg nerves and causing chronic inflammation, besides the auto-immunities that to this day are not finally determined; some say Lupus, others possible psoriatic arthritis or spondylitis.....who knows, but so much worse; who cares?
None of the doctors who gladly take our money but do nothing for me...
they don't care; they only care that I shouldn't take any real painkillers or steroids as that might cause side effects which might bring them in jeopardy of some malpractice or a scolding from the insurance companies......and that is the state of medicine in these United States of Cash Cows. I am consumed by bitterness, yet anger is very contra-indicated for recovery. I want to believe that you would want to save me, by donating funds or services or goods, or even morphine, to help me get the surgeries that I need, all of which are going to be accounted for publicly on this site, including videos when possible, though I hate the thought of anyone seeing me looking like this. You deserve every gratitude and good feeling to see evidence of your good work, to see this one who is imprisoned with crippling and pain, to be given the tools and helps to be able to break free from the prison. If you saw someone with a truck on top of them, you'd want to find a way to get it off them. That's what my spine feels like, with the 3 ruptured discs that keep me from being able to stand up, to be able to walk, like there's a truck on me, and that truck is getting heavier every year, yes I have been in this condition for years, in this pain, getting more and more crippled and suffering even worse pain events that no one has explanations for other than possible spasms that are like the devil claws a gut hook into me and yanks on it a while, and I don't know if I'm going to puke or be disemboweled, I cannot find strength to yell out or crawl for help. Now a new arthritic outbreak is in both knees at the same time, this is typical of these autoimmune arthritic diseases, yet my first 2 rheumatologists told me I did not have arthritis, since the rheumatoid factor in my bloodwork was only borderline or not high enough. Ha ha ha. They never heard of seronegative arthritis, I guess. God help me to be relieved of bitterness, of anger, of pain while you're at it, please, sir.
I will provide receipts to everyone for every donation, and proof that the funds wer used for these medical necessary surgeries, for medical devices and disability aids and medicines, and I also ask for someone to donate their services getting me filed for a 501c3 non profit charitable federal status, so that I can provide all donors with tax deductible receipts for their donations. I can do so little for myself, it is shameful, and I can only tell you that the one, true God, Jehovah, He will make a good out of what the enemy meant for bad. This is always been true in my experience, and I declare it here that this also will be made a good out of what has been so bad for me, caused by the enemy.